LaKeshia T. Hodge is Empowering At-Risk Youth Through Love

TUP EP 078

Voiceover: [: 00:00:00

Nom: I'm excited to nominate my aunt Lakeisha Hodge as an uplifter.

She has shown amazing [: 00:00:30

At the time, which was around 11, it has showed me how much she truly cared [00:01:00] about making a real difference in her community and actually serving those people who are in those communities. Fuchsia always does more than expected, as shown through the many different events and programs of the Struggle with Love Foundation and her hard work and desire to help others inspire [00:01:15] everyone around her.

grateful for her leadership [: 00:01:30

She is the true embodiment of an uplifter.

enges, but have done so with [: 00:01:45

LaKeisha was nominated by her niece, Sydney Richardson, and I'm just [00:02:15] so thrilled to be here with her today and to hear her story. Welcome LaKeisha.

looking forward to hopefully [: 00:02:30

The many challenges we face every day and just know it's not all for nothing. There is a reason. So keep chugging along.

that because I think in the [: 00:02:45

makes a difference. What inspired you to co found the Struggle of Love Foundation, Lakeisha?

It wasn't easy. I watched my [: 00:03:15

I watched her struggle and work two, three jobs sometimes just to provide for the [00:03:30] family. And just going through some of those challenges. And then as a young adult, I found myself homeless in a shelter. With a newborn baby and reached out to the community for help and assistance to get on my feet and I found those things Within the [00:03:45] community and so I felt like it was my responsibility to give back in the areas of struggle And also, you know when I met my husband he was homeless.

foundation We've done a lot [: 00:04:00

Extraordinary to

ugh something like that, but [: 00:04:15

LaKeshia: Yeah, we felt like it was our responsibility to give back. We were once the people that stood in lines at the [00:04:30] backpack giveaway that were in line for food stamps or emergency rental assistance, those type of things.

And so we try to do our best [: 00:04:45

You know, you have somebody in your corner to support you, to help you, to guide you, to mentor you. [00:05:00] And that's what we wanted to be for the community and for the youth in our community especially.

Aransas: Hmm. And I think that that's true for everyone, isn't it? That what we need is somebody beside us that we can trust to help us.

Struggle of Love Foundation [: 00:05:15

LaKeshia: The Struggle of Love Foundation was founded in the year 2000. We started the organization just with basic community outreach events. And so that was just seeing the areas of struggle in the community, trying to meet the needs of the community. [00:05:30] And we started doing outreach events like backpack giveaways.

e hardly ever received their [: 00:05:45

And that's initially how the organization was launched with those four pillar outreach events [00:06:00] that we did just to provide some type of support to the community in those areas. Over time, the organization evolved. We started a mentor program that was an attraction to sports. And so my husband decided that he was going to coach [00:06:15] basketball.

hed in, in different schools [: 00:06:30

And then we were able to meet the [00:06:45] families through the youth. And so we learned. Through that, a lot of the families were struggling with food, with access to mental health, with other different resources. And so it just kind of evolved to where we wanted to feel everyone's need. And so we started adding mental [00:07:00] health services.

f our kids were getting into [: 00:07:15

And so we wanted to provide assistance to them as well, because, you know, sometimes your family structure or the environment you're in is hard to not get involved with the [00:07:30] justice system. And so we're just trying to find ways to help them affirm their positive in those situations. And try not to go down the wrong path, but also giving them resources and access to other opportunities to keep them out of [00:07:45] trouble.

zation has evolved over time [: 00:08:00

Aransas: through the youth.

Wow, and just being responsive to those needs, taking this really holistic view of it.

LaKeshia: Yes.

come inequity is such a huge [: 00:08:15

LaKeshia: Systemically, I think it should be [00:08:30] equity in opportunities.

e. I think sometimes they're [: 00:08:45

And this could be, you [00:09:00] know, job opportunities. A lot of times in these communities, there's certain barriers such as transportation, childcare, a lot of barriers exist within these communities to where they can't access. And so just looking at the whole. Family, the [00:09:15] whole person and what challenges they do face.

support the whole need? And [: 00:09:30

Then it is still a challenge for them to be able to access those opportunities.

e kids and these families to [: 00:10:00

As somebody who has struggled, who has helped others, who have [00:10:15] struggled, who's been really close to this situation, What do you wish other people who don't have a close view of this, what do you wish they understood?

derstood that sometimes it's [: 00:10:30

And I felt like with the experience that I had growing up, it's just like sometimes you become a product of your environment because [00:10:45] you don't know any better. And in order for you to know better, then you have to seek those services and resources or that knowledge and education to try to find a way out of those circumstances.

But not everyone has that [: 00:11:00

I think too, the family structure has been so watered down in our community with the lack of fathers being present. Mom's trying to work several [00:11:30] jobs, as I explained with our situation, and so it's hard for a mother to even really know their children, to pay attention to their children, to give them the attention that they need to thrive and grow and become, you know, amazing young adults.

And [: 00:11:45

I mean, love is one thing in our community that we feel like that's why we named the Organization Struggle of Love Foundation is because [00:12:15] A lot of people in our community are struggling with love, how to love themselves, how to love each other, and just how to show love to just the community. And so sometimes that's all it takes is for somebody to know and feel loved.

for them to [: 00:12:30

Aransas: Yeah, that's such an amazing point. You [00:12:45] talked about what it was like to feel trapped in circumstances. What did it take for you to figure out those first steps?

or me, it really took really [: 00:13:00

What's next? You know, what am I going to eat tonight? Where am I going to sleep tonight? And so we're just so focused on [00:13:30] survival that we don't even get to know ourselves. And so for me, it took just muting the outside world and just taking some time to be alone for a while and getting to know myself.

e goals. You know, there was [: 00:13:45

I can't even fathom like [00:14:00] five years from now. I have no clue, but I felt like that one question helped me structure my journey for the rest of my life. And so now I'm constantly building out a five year plan for myself, personally, what goals I [00:14:15] can achieve, like. short term, long term goals, how to get there, what's the road map, what does it look like?

ls and where I want to be in [: 00:14:30

Then you transfer it into your business. And so everything in my life starts with the goal. And I think once you get to know [00:14:45] yourself and you know, some things that you want to accomplish and achieve in life, then you can start building out that roadmap and those goals and setting some expectations for yourself.

ke, not only put these goals [: 00:15:00

To keep myself encouraged [00:15:15] to keep going on my journey to meeting my five year goal plan was something that really helped me to get kind of out of the rut that I was in. And you would be amazed at once I did that, how quickly things started changing and evolving for me in [00:15:30] my personal life because I actually had a vision and a plan put in place and a map to get there.

e lessons along the way. Not [: 00:15:45

Just don't give up. It didn't work this time. Maybe next [00:16:00] time. Do it a different way, but keep going.

ion, you knew where you were [: 00:16:15

But as long as there was no destination, it was just endless space. We get [00:16:30] paralyzed. What are these Kids say when you present them with an invitation to imagine themselves five years out

So what we do with the youth [: 00:16:45

Can you excuse me one moment? Of course, like five people in my office right now It's a party. It's always organized chaos [00:17:00] around here. You know, that's what I call it We're always storming, but it feels normal. So I would say it's normal.

Aransas: It works. And I think too, right? Like that's, that's the nature of how you're doing things that you're saying.

ive. We're not going to take [: 00:17:15

LaKeshia: Yeah, there is absolutely no way that we could have ever worked from home. So I was really jelly of all the people that got to work from home during COVID and beyond [00:17:30] because we just don't have an organization that would allow us to do that because we're here for the community and the community is here all the time.

me they achieve a milestone, [: 00:17:45

Maybe it's one year, maybe you need six months, but we start small with the youth [00:18:00] because they have no idea of what a goal plan even is to begin with. And just to start with that 30 days, it could be just something as simple as hygiene. Like, make sure you get up and brush your teeth every day. If you could do that for the next 30 [00:18:15] days, that's a goal, right?

he door for a young lady you [: 00:18:30

And so it's really kind of crawling before you walk, [00:18:45] starting from the beginning and getting them to love their self because obviously they're not doing those things, those simple things, because they don't feel love for their selves. And so once we get them to love their self, And to know what love is, then we can continue on with [00:19:00] setting some structures and goal plans in place for the youth.

the youth that we work with. [: 00:19:15

Aransas: Wow. I love that you're starting with the self love piece too.

What does that look like?

nd so everybody that's here, [: 00:19:30

And so for me, I'm Lucky Lakeisha. So we have like Energetic I, Amazing Ashley, and so we start with [00:19:45] positive word about yourself. So establish an affirmation name for yourself first, and then Things that are good about yourself, what is good about you and saying it, voicing it, believing it is some things that we try [00:20:00] to get our youth to do on a consistent basis.

And then also doing that for [: 00:20:15

We try to do positive, healthy conflict resolution. So when they are in situations that they feel [00:20:45] like requires a response, make sure it's a positive response and that we're also leading with love in the situations that we're in, whether it's a confrontation, a lot of things that the kids face, but just making sure that you [00:21:00] see the positive in the situation and that You can hopefully end it on a positive note and that we don't ever resort to any violence, making anybody else feel bad, putting anybody down with hurtful words, respect for their community, [00:21:15] making sure that they're respecting the spaces around them, the people around them, that they surround their self with a positive community.

. But definitely making sure [: 00:21:30

What's good about you? What's your affirmation name before you get started with your day? Because it does really help to do that. [00:21:45]

Aransas: That's amazing. And how different all of our lives would be if we reminded ourselves of our strengths. So you talked about surviving as a way of being. What would thriving look like?

LaKeshia: Thriving [: 00:22:00

We have a dynamic team. Yes. We still have goals and visions and things that we want to achieve, but coming [00:22:30] from. A small nonprofit that started in our garage to now having over 20 employees, two locations, tons of resources and services for the community. I feel like we're thriving. And for me [00:22:45] as a visionary and.

others that really care and [: 00:23:00

And so for me, that's thriving to see our work. Camp students happy and engaging and enjoying [00:23:15] camp to see the testimonials that we get back from our youth, from their families, from the parents, just the impact that it made on their life. All of those things are a sign to me that the organization is thriving and that we're doing what we [00:23:30] said we would do.

And that shows the integrity and the passion for the organization and how we want to continue to just evolve and be that pillar in the community. For the community,

illiant way of looking at it [: 00:23:45

You're doing a lot for a lot of people, like really every uplifter that we talk [00:24:00] to here. And that's, we pay a tax for. the care for others. Just loving people has a tax, but to live a life of service as you are requires a lot of mental, physical, emotional, [00:24:15] spiritual energy. How do you replenish your energy?

and I love the work that we [: 00:24:30

And so you take that home with you. And when I'm at home, I'm trying to think of ways that we can improve. Did I forget something? Who's in need? Is everybody going to sleep good tonight? And those are the things that are always [00:25:00] on my mind. And so here recently, since we established our mental health team, I've been trying to do better with Reaching out to them and just asking them, what are some things that I could do for self care?

ing to know yourself because [: 00:25:15

It could be a multitude of [00:25:30] things. It could be reading a book, it could be getting a massage, it could be hitting your neck, you know, it's so many things. And so I still just have to find that thing for me that feels like self care in the moment. Right now, I don't have that thing. I mean, I went to get my nails done [00:25:45] yesterday and even doing that, it's just like, I'm so in a hurry.

like, I don't have time for [: 00:26:00

[00:26:15] I just have to admit and be honest. And also for my team, because I know how important it is to do self care, I make sure they get it. And so I make sure I take them out on team building activities quarterly. We go and we get massages, I'll take them to the [00:26:30] spa. We'll just do a day out at the escape room, just building as a team and doing something fun or going out for lunch.

portant it is, and so I make [: 00:26:45

Aransas: What would be the value for you in doing that?

LaKeshia: The value [: 00:27:00

Sometimes I feel like this is my self care, like helping the community. I can't pull myself away from it. There's been many a times where I wanted to just like throw in the town. I'm like, today's my last [00:27:30] day. I'm not doing this anymore. I'm so overwhelmed in that moment. And I just can't, it just, so I'm like, maybe this is what my self care is, is just to help others to see others doing well and happy and prospering in their lives.[00:27:45]

moments, I feel rejuvenated. [: 00:28:00

Aransas: Yeah, it's really easy to put off our self care and to feel like it's a luxury and it's negotiable when [00:28:15] really it's the least negotiable. But I think like you, most of us find that those big events of self care are really challenging to create. I find that It's creating simple [00:28:30] daily practices, little things that we can do every single day because they take basically no resources, no time.

re, and turning those into a [: 00:28:45

So if I'm doing a whole [00:29:15] lot of listening. I find a space where I can talk for 10 minutes or if I'm doing a whole lot of sitting at a computer, I try to get outside for 10 minutes and I really just break it down into things that are five or 10 minutes long that [00:29:30] give me the opposite because I think that's what happens when we go on vacation.

But I really believe that we [: 00:29:45

LaKeshia: Yeah, one goal that I've been [00:30:00] trying to achieve for the last three weeks is just drinking more water. I'm like, put some water next to your bed so when you wake up, get the bottle of water, drink it before you do anything, like just drink just down that bottle of water and then get started. And then after you get [00:30:15] ready and get dressed and out, drink another bottle of water.

get from behind my desk. And [: 00:30:30

Now every Monday, I'm like, we're gonna start fresh on Monday, you're gonna drink this water when you wake up, and you're gonna keep doing it throughout the day. [00:30:45] And I can't even get that done for myself, so. It's hard, and because it's different, right? I wish I could get better. In my head, I feel like I have all the self care that I need, that I'm doing a great job, but in reality, I know it's not [00:31:00] true.

r I could do that thing that [: 00:31:15

And so I appreciate you saying just one little thing every day, whatever that is. Someone told me just sit in peace and quiet and for 60 seconds, just for one minute, just [00:31:45] tune out all the noise and just sit there and then increase that for two minutes the next day. But for me, my life is all about the time and I hate to waste any minute.

omething. That's my problem. [: 00:32:00

Aransas: You sound driven. You are driven. You're [00:32:15] amazing. Can I ask you one more question on this? You're probably like, let me go and stop asking me questions. Let me get back to work. No, you're fine. Okay, here's my question for you. Is there anything you can think of doing [00:32:30] that you're like, oh my gosh, that would be so much fun and just like delicious?

like to do cost, that's the [: 00:32:45

It's just so [00:33:00] peaceful, it's so quiet, it's so Relaxing and just the motion of just like floating in the air. I want to do that. That sounds amazing.

xpensive and time consuming. [: 00:33:15

You said it's about, like, the swaying, it's about [00:33:30] the

LaKeshia: quiet, the calming, yeah. I wish I could ride a hot air balloon to work every day, and then I would just,

Aransas: Oh my gosh, wouldn't that be amazing?

LaKeshia: That would be amazing.

ttle hammock chair here that [: 00:33:45

But I put in earplugs and sit in my little hammock chair sometimes and just stare at a wall. But you could even watch [00:34:00] videos of hot air balloons. And that sense memory that you just described is so powerful because that's something already in your body that creates a sense of calm. I am starting to wonder if maybe there's some way to [00:34:15] kind of recreate that feeling of relaxation and peace that you experienced through something that's just convenient and cheap and easy.

ead right now and I can just [: 00:34:30

Like, it was so peaceful. So I wasn't expecting that once you got up and you get so high, you can't hear anything. You can't hear anything. You can't hear any cars. You can't, you know, you can hear anything. And I'm like that too. I like [00:35:00] quiet. Like I hardly ever turn on my TV when I'm home. As soon as the TV comes on, it's cause my husband walked in or one of the kids, you know, but I don't like noise when I'm home.

I don't like TV.

ment then? Yeah. Yeah. Let's [: 00:35:15

Notice [00:35:45] the thoughts that come in. That's good data, right? And it's not about trying to get it right or do it perfectly or anything, but just experimenting with what happens if I do it for 60 seconds. And what I have found is that if you [00:36:00] show up and experiment with it over and over again for even five days, you get so much data about what would make it easier to show up and do it regularly.

t to be able to create maybe [: 00:36:15

LaKeshia: You know last year it was the [00:36:30] strangest thing I would sit and look out my window and for a while There was this little bird that would come to the window every day To visit me And we were trying to figure out what the meaning [00:36:45] of that was, because it was the same little bird.

utes, and like he was trying [: 00:37:00

Why does he come every day? And then a couple of times he brought like a little birdie friend with him. They would both sit there and try to get in my window. And it was like the strangest thing that [00:37:15] was continuing to happen all summer long last summer. And this summer he didn't come back. But that would get me looking out the window because I would be sitting there waiting for this little birdie to come visit me.

me. He would come every day. [: 00:37:30

And so I've spent some time doing that too, just sitting here looking at the building manifesting good things for this building. That's the journey that we're on right now is trying to purchase a building for the organization. And there's one for sale that fits [00:38:00] our needs right out my window.

Aransas: Maybe the bird's over there now waiting for you.

LaKeshia: Maybe. It's like I'm at your new office. Exactly. Come on in.

ell, I know you have lots to [: 00:38:15

LaKeshia: deserve it. Thank you. I'm going to try to do [00:38:30] better. I got to map this out too, just like I do everything else.

n it's you. Like, I could do [: 00:38:45

Aransas: that. Your needs, Lakeisha, are just as important as everyone else's.

s everyone else. And it's so [: 00:39:00

I've turned the air conditioning back on. I'm about to

. They got the heat blasting.[: 00:39:30

Aransas: I'm so grateful for you and your time. Thank you for joining us on the Uplifters podcast.

nce is to remember that your [: 00:39:45

Keep climbing, keep believing, and keep [00:40:00] uplifting others. Thanks for having me on the show today.

h the Uplifters in your life [: 00:40:15

com, head over to Spotify, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcast and like, follow and rate our show. It'll really [00:40:30] help us connect with more uplifters and it'll ensure you never miss one of these beautiful stories. Mm,

shine with rosemary, and I'm [: 00:40:45

Toss a star in half for be around best love for relish in a new prime land, a tree in springtime dance. With that, [00:41:00] all hindsight, bring the sun to twilight. Lift you up, whoa, Lift you up, whoa, Lift [00:41:15] you up, whoa,

Lift you up.

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, [: 00:41:30

I cried. It's that little thing you did with your voice. Right, in the pre chorus, right? I was like Mommy, stop crying. Mommy, stop crying. You're disturbing the [00:42:00] peace.